I hosted a party recently the party in general was great. the only problem was that what came out of my stereo that night ended up to be the crappiest music known to man. My mistake as a host was letting my guests choose the music. In this post i will reflect on how the ultimate source of music turned in to the anti-social-media when put into the hands of intoxicated guests on a party.
I love hosting parties. It is not that often though because of my busy normal schedule. But in the summer time, in my house and studio at Öland, there is both space and time for it. On my latest little get together late one Sunday night made the mistake of letting my guest choose the music.
Normally i play house music on my parties. I am quite proud of my house collection and it normally sets a nice atmosphere and by going a bit up tempo later at night it usually end quite good. This time however some om my guests started to complain. Somebody suggested that connecting spotify to the stereo so that the minimalistic progressive cozy house could be changed. Here I did my fatal mistake. I thought, What a hell, give them what they want and they will be happy! and connected everything and offered the computer to the others to choose.
It started out ok. Some commercial summer hits went on and everything was cool for a a couple of songs. The change of music however was not appreciated by some other guests and suddenly some other guests started to approach the source of the, in their opinion, “dreadful crap” that was currently playing.
With the new self-declared music experts within reach of the computer a sudden change was soon to come. Some swift searches exchanged the radio hits was changed to some kind of techno from an artist one ever heard of. Satisfied by their contribution the resourceful electronica advocates went their way. By this time the others had start dancing and was not happy by the sudden change of mood. They managed to stand it for a few minutes before changing it. The techno lovers however was not that easy to fool. Off course they went back with a vengeance to change the music again. And on it went in the same fashion.
The fact that the music was changed in the middle of every other got more and more people aware about the situation. The other guests started to gravitate towards the source of the music and wanted in on the fun. More half songs were there for delivered to a more and more unsatisfied audience. There was even long periods of silence when someone clearly over refreshed gentleman started to try to find “this very special song” he had forgotten the name of. People also started to fight over the poor computer. It was not long before the whole crowd was obsessed with messing with the music and at the same time stopping others from getting their way.
Now you might wodnder, Did the fact that the guests as a collective were selecting the music make my them happy? Hell no! Quite the contrary. It seemed like the more people were invovled the more unsatisfied they became as a goup.
I witnessed this madness with wonder, suddenly feeling like a scientist studying intoxicated mice in a cage in a laboratory. How could people equipped with spotify, a virtual abyss of music were able not find music that satisfy any one ells on the party?
The main problem i gather, after viewing this social circus for a few hours, was that my guests was trying to play music they wanted to hear them selfs, not music that other people liked. The interesting thing with music is that it actually has the potential of setting a good mood on a party. If used right that is. In this particular situation, reople were seemingly trying to show off how many song titles they while at the same time trying to shut down the other peoples choses.
It turns out that this phenomenon has a name, You box. When free music services like You tube or spotify is used as a as a jukebox on a party. This get more and more popular and an accepted part of how we socialize. I wonder where there is an You box etiquette in place for this or when there is an engineering solution to it. imagine an interface simple enough for drunk guests to be able to handle it and with an interface that wont allow people to interfere with other peoples choices. This can’t happen soon enough. Until then will guests not be allowed to select the music on my parties. I have to draw a line somewhere.
What do you think? Make a comment!
/ Mårten
I was there, but I never even got hold of the computer at all. That was probably a good thing since I was rather intoxicated myself. Instead I ended up in other places of the house, or outdoors, were the music wasn’t so clearly heard just to get away from all those crappy halfsongs. The party itself was a bit lost in the battle for the proof of the best musictaste. I agree that the host should draw the line, and serv up the music or the chosen DJ he or she feels is right for the happening. Spotify makes a mess at parties.